


Who are we, to wonder where we’re going?

by Hunk_Muffin



Category: Cable and Deadpool
Genre: eyy first thing?, idk?, implied one sided i think but honestly it's just idk what this is, kinda (much) cheesy, nathan's weird train of thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-02
Updated: 2018-12-02
Packaged: 2019-09-05 16:42:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16814494
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hunk_Muffin/pseuds/Hunk_Muffin
Summary: Two guys are standing together on a balcony in Providence during the comfortable silence of night.Wade's actually quiet for once and Nathan has some time to think.





	Who are we, to wonder where we’re going?

**Author's Note:**

> first small fic/thing i finished in like 2 years yaay (?)  
> Which is odd rly cus like this is kinda outta my comfort zone (can i have one if i rarely even write?) and honestly not sure what this is, word barf that came from listening to 1am animal crossing soundtrack and bing reading cable/deadpool fics's  
> idk but hey, it's probably done, it has words, yay me!
> 
> i have no idea where this takes place side's that it's during the time Providence lives and in Cable & Deadpool, and idk cus continuity is a mess and so am i! Tho some references to Deadpool (1997) #22 and Cable & Deadpool
> 
> kinda cheesy cus i've been gorging on mozzarella sticks, cue the curtains!

_Nathan found him shoulders tensed with his arms crossed against the railing on the balcony that overlooked the rest of island and the ocean.  
The night was quiet, citizens of Providence sound asleep in their homes as time slowly passed by. It felt as if nobody was awake in the world besides the two of them. Nate felt a sense of calm wash over him like the waves that gently rocked against the island as he walked over to the uncharacteristically silent man. Leaning next to him, they stood there. Neither of them uttering a word. _

_Slowly, Nathan saw the leather clad man untense. Gloved hands relaxing the death grip he had on his arms. Watching out of the corner of his eyes as Deadpool took a deep breath of the cold and fresh night air._

_He leaned closer to Wade, both standing in comfortable silence._

It was rare, impossible even to most, to see Deadpool quiet longer than five seconds without steps taken to assure it. But here it was, happening. With only Nathan to witness such a rare moment, with only Nathan to acknowledge it.

In most cases, the other man's silence was a telltale sign of danger. That there was something decidedly wrong happening. When there were no quips, no singing, no pop culture references or repetitions of those absurd words he loved saying. It was a sign that something wasn't right, a reason to be on edge and on guard. To be prepared for the worst.  
But this was a different kind of silence, one Cable didn't know even was possible until he was there experiencing it. It was… peaceful. If anyone was heard associating that word with Deadpool they would be laughed at. But in the moment, it was true.

_His fingers went to the edges of the shorters man's neck, silently seeking permission.  
When he received no answer but no movement to prevent him either, Nathan slowly, gently, lifted the red mask. _

His face. Deadpool had called in that corner of San Francisco all those days ago. Where the quiet was disturbed by their fighting, shortly followed by Wades panicking over the lost of that ridiculous box he was using to cover his head. He remembered his confusion and the urge to roll his eyes when Deadpool ran, desperate to find something to conceal his scarred face with.  
Cable didn’t care then about the scars and tumors that covered Wade’s body, didn't care now. Although not in the same way. He didn't mind that they're there, naturally. To Nate they were a sign, proof of the battle Wade fought every day against the vicious cancer that ailed him. Along with that now it was accompanied by the feeling of... pride. He was proud Wade felt comfortable enough to be maskless around him.

The mask was his shield; it protected him from a harsh judgemental world and gave him confidence. It encouraged him to be Deadpool, the jokester, the insane, the careless. Without it, the cartoonish armor melted. He became more genuine. Vulnerable as he was fierce, prepared to attack anyone who judged his appearance or to assume the worse out of people. Throwing self-deprecating humor around flippantly before anyone else could have the chance.

_Nathans fingers lingered on the shorter man's head for a moment before draping the mask over the railing, leaning back against it._

If the mask was his shield, his voice would be his sword.

His weapon of choice, the thing that most of his enemies hated or fear. His constant and inane chattering designed to distract, to make people underestimate him, to unbalance people. Both in combat and outside of it.  
Initially, Cable was one of them. Annoyed to no end by the stream of words that never seemed to stop, talking about utter nonsense he had no time for. Now, he didn’t mind. Enjoyed it, even. It became background noise, soothing.

Irene would call him crazy, likely as would most if Nathan said it outloud. But it was the truth, he liked listening to the mercenary. He's learned to appreciate Wade’s questionable sense of humor. He liked hearing that beautiful Demi Moore voice talk about everything and nothing all at once when they were together, ranting about or praising the randomest of things. Even if at times it _has_ proved to be a nuisance, Nathan truthfully did like it. It was reliable, something that could never be forced to change.

So for the mercenary to of dropped both his most personal shield and preferred sword while he was around, it was far from being a small deal. At least to Nathan.

It was... nice to know he was trusted this much. He knew he was one of the few if not the only person that the man trusted or felt comfortable around to this level. Even if it was displayed for only this one night.

_They remained standing there in comfortable silence, Wades gaze firmly on Providence and the star covered sky while Nathan’s on the other hand lingered on the mercenary. Content that in the middle of the chaos and blood infused life he was drowning in, Wade could find a moment of solace on the island he created._

If he did things right, he could offer Wade more than this. If he did things right, he could help him find peace, heal him. Save from the poisonous life the man believed there be no escape from.

But for now he’ll enjoy this moment of serenity. He could think about plans to help the shorter man later.

It was... odd. He mused. How once he saved the world from itself to a point where he could allow more time for himself, the following thing he wanted to focus on was saving the man next to him. To such a degree it ought to be worrying, really.

Deadpool was unpredictable, the ultimate wildcard, the loose cannon. Nathan was keenly aware of what the man was capable of, although he and the rest of the world frequently forget.

Wade played the role of the maniac, of the killer, the careless and the idiot so well everyone tends to forget how clever and terrifyingly (beautifully) efficient the man could be at what he did best. Killing.

Often Nate suspected that Deadpool forgot as well.

_He turned to stare towards Providence, the island was beautiful, even when it slept. This was the place that he could use to inspire the hope he always had to the rest of the world, proof that things could be better. Even for people like him and Deadpool. Especially for people like them._

Something that never failed to surprise him was just how _loyal_ Wade could be. _Was_. How hard the mercenary did try _(for him, he realized as an afterthought accompanied by a pleasant feeling.)_ , how much he sought for approval. To change for the better and how Wade feared being alone.

It should be concerning how much he's grown to care for the mercenary.  
So many people abused him, used him, deceived him, lied to him, tortured him.

(If Nathan were to be truly honest, he would admit he had been one of them. But his intentions were good, they have always been for Wades own good.)

Nathan wanted to ~~_(needed to)_~~ be the one who helped him, who _healed_ him. It was a want that grew a bit more every time he saw the mercenary, starting with the Façade Virus. ( _Although he suspected the seed had been planted when he talked and fought with the man in the place where cable cars went to die. The first time Nathan realised that Wade had far more than meets the eye._ )

He thought about how Domino saw him, how she couldn’t trust him. Because she’s seen Cable ruin everything he’s ever tried.  
And like that doubts creeped up, not for the first time _(He wondered if they were ever alone, or would always be accompanied by regret and guilt.)._

But he refuses to feed them by pondering on them. He could do it; he knew he could.

(As long as his plans went well. As long as nothing unexpected happened. As long as Providence succeeds. As long as Wade allowed him to. As long as he doesn't do anything wrong.)

But that was the problem, wasn’t it? You could never plot things out perfectly when it came to the mercenary. Deadpool could tip the scales or shatter them completely in any scenario.  
Perhaps that was why Wade depended on money, because he was missing the morals or friends to otherwise choose what to do.

Looking down at the still silent man, _(a nuisance, unexpected, deadly, graceful, unique, talented, admirable, breathtaking)_ he wondered _why_ once more. Why did he want to help him.

Was it because he's unpredictable? _(Nathan did like knowing, obsessively so.)_. Was it because Wade needed controlling? _(But he didn't want to control him.)_ Was it because Nathan liked defying what people thought impossible? _(Was his ego really that big?)_

They had so much in common and yet were complete opposites, fundamentally similar yet different.

(He couldn’t bare to think of what would happen if he ruined this, if he ruined Wade.)

_Nathan’s train of thoughts was interrupted by Wade when the man suddenly leaned a bit against him. Eyes now closed as he let out a small, peaceful, sigh.  
_ _He felt a faint smile threaten its way onto the corners of his lip at that; he let it._

(He knew that this wouldn't, couldn't last long.)

Sooner than wanted, Cable would have to go back to saving the world. Go back to making sure things went according to plan, giving hope to people, attending diplomatic meetings and working until he felt dead on his feet. Deadpool would go back to his never-ending inane talking, putting his shields back up as he dives recklessly into the ocean of blood and pain where thanks to his regenerative powers he could drown in for all eternity, and would drown simply because it was easier, more natural to him then any alternatives he might see.

Sooner than wanted, they would have to go back to being the men the world perceived them to be. Cable, because he had to be what the world needed, Deadpool. Because he knew nothing else.

_But for now, for tonight. Nathan will enjoy this rare moment of serenity with Wade. Where they could both breath, pretend like they were two normal humans enjoying the calm of night._

(Maybe one day, he'll be able to sort out these feelings.)

Maybe one day, he'll understand the reason why his heart fluttered when Wade shifted. Tilting his head up to look at him with those intense brown eyes that have seen countless sorrows. Looking at him as a slight grin played across his scarred face.  
Maybe one day he'll understand why he wrapped an arm around Wade’s shoulders instinctively when the man leaned further against him. Warmth passing through touch.  
Understand the reason why they stood there together like two puzzle pieces that fitted perfectly yet were from different puzzles until the light of the sun made itself known. Breaking into the horizon and painting the sky with its colors.

(It couldn't last, and they both knew it. Too soon they'll have to go back to being Cable and Deadpool. Two men who both have been through and lived pain, one unable to let go of hope and the other who could never afford it.)

_But for now, they'll watch the sunrise on Providence. Comfortably standing next to each other as if they didn't have a single care in the world until the silence was ultimately broken._

* * *

"Y'know, even with the healing factor and all that, I totally feel like my legs have been Medusa-d. But ‘least my back probably isn't half as sore as yours, old man," Wade said with a grin.  
Nathan raised an eyebrow, “My back feels fine, Wade. I’m not that old, and I have more hair than you do.”  
  
“ _Rude!_ I’m hurt Nate! Not my fault that TV lies about those hair growing shampoo products! And if anything when I become a grandpa like you I get more hair, a big ol’ busy beard according to some comic’s. Never get a beard ‘kay Nate? I mean I look _great_ but you with a bushy weird-ass beard? Nope nada zip zap no and I can say that as a _fact_ cus I _have_ seen you with a weird beard and really long ass hair when I went to that gross hippie eggplant alternate universe where you were Brother Nathan and fully embraced your wannabee Jesus phase! I mean the one where you were _War_ , compromising much? Sure it was _kiiinda_ cool but the whole _rrr I’m evil now bow down to Apocalypse_ gig looked preeetty damn weird on you. Oh but that tentacles slash T.O. virus kinky world? _Those_...”

And like that things were going back to normal. Although Wade hasn’t moved away. Still leaning comfortably against the warmth of Nathan’s body while he talked about alternate universes and stories that were likely far from the truth but nonetheless entertaining.

When he was finished, the silence returned, but the sun was rising and morning arrived. Their time was up.

Wade lingered a bit longer next to him before taking a step away. Talking again, “Man I am _huuuuunn_ -gry! I’m feeling Mexican, hey Nate you wanna come with to that Mexican place and join me and my sweet _sweet_ chimichangas in some hot sexy moan inducing action?” he offered cheerfully, even though they both knew he wouldn’t _(couldn’t)_. But a fond smile still found its way on Nathan’s face.  
“I don’t have your healing factor, Wade. I doubt that deep fried burritos would be kind to me or my digestive system.”

The mercenary shrugged, simultaneously grabbing his mask and doing a backflip onto the railing. “We-ell it’s your loss, have fun being a boring old man and being the messiah today Priscilla,”

They looked at each other, standing in awkward silence. Neither of them wanted to go but both of them knew there was no point delaying the inevitable.  
Wade looked as if he was about to say something, but whatever it was he wouldn't know. Deadpool merely shook his head again before somersaulting away. Jumping onto the rooftops of Providence.

He didn’t look back once.

* * *

Nathan watched him leave, admiring for a moment how agile and acrobatic Deadpool was before returning to his office. For the first time somewhat unwilling to get the day started.  
He shook his head, there was work to get done. Cable had wasted enough time.

_What was it that Wade was going to say earlier?_ he wondered while sorted through some documents. Then another thought crossed his mind, one that he perhaps had been thinking of for longer than he realized. A warm feeling settling in him even as he shook his head in denial. Nothing would be that simple between them.  
But still, he found himself asking anyways,

Was it love? 

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading, i think? Out of practice with writing and def new to the whole actually posting stuff gig, but i wanted to be rather new then not part of it at all  
> so yep! There's be my weird late night rather than studying thingamajig! Really random but hey why not
> 
> Nate needs to chill tho, they both do, @ marvel give them a break cowards
> 
> Titles a reference to AJR Netflix Trip which i heart


End file.
